80 percent Indian youths support live-in-relationships: Study reveals

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Representational Image
Representational Image

New Delhi : There is a saying ‘love knows no boundaries’. The proverb stands perfect for those people who are in love and share same home, same bed, share food, resolve fights etc, despite of matrimonial relationship. They call it live-in-relationship and don’t bother the social comments. There are hundreds of unmarried couples who live under same roof just like married people do. Research says that 80 percent of Indians support live-in relationships.

A massive 1.4 lakh netizens took part in a live-in relationships poll conducted by Inshorts, a news app, in May. “According to the survey, more than 80 per cent millennials think that live-in relationships are still considered a taboo in Indian society while more than 47 per cent Indians are of the opinion that marriage is better when choosing between marriage and lifelong live-ins,” stated an IANS report.

The Supreme Court recently passed a verdict repeating that adult men and women have the right to live together without marriage. But, can the society accept the new mindset of youth? 45 per cent of the participants who took part in the survey opined that no matter what the judiciary does, it has least effect on how the society take the concept of live-in relationships. 

According to Kamna Chhibber, Head (Mental Health) Department of Mental Health and Behavioural Sciences of Fortis Healthcare, no one can change insight unless the change comes from within. “We need the right conversation, a broader worldview to know how times are changing and the flexibility to accept the change. How a society perceives an issue is influenced by what we, as a population, believe in. Change in any concept has to come from within,” explained Chhibber. To understand the seriousness of the issue, Chhibber cites the example of ending of slavery in America. It just didn’t happen overnight and nor did people accept a new concept suddenly. Years of struggle, dialogues and campaigns changed the society’s view on slavery.

However, it is not the societal prejudice that unmarried couples worry about most. “Couples in live-in relationships are under the constant pressure to make the relationship work. More than cultural or societal challenges, couples suffer from self-created stress. They often worry that since it’s their decision to live together, the responsibility to make it successful rests on their shoulders as well,” said Chhibber.

“Couples face the most difficult times when they do not have a third person to turn to for advice or to talk to about the issues in their lives. With no one to give them another perspective, they might often feel very burdened by the sacrifices they made,” shared Chhibber.

But despite the hurdles they faced, couples are hopeful that injustice against people who are in a live-in relationship will change with time. “We took this decision because we have lost our faith in the institution of marriage. In India, we believe the concept of marriage is patriarchal and it encourages practices like dowry. If living under the safe room without being married gives us the flexibility to lead a life that allows gender equality and mutual respect, then why not embrace this lifestyle instead of marriage?” asked Ravi and Bhavna, who often face social criticism from friends and family for their decision to live together.

“In fact, my father once called me lustful and hurled abuses at me. I know he would never understand that it is more about compatibility than lust. Suppose, I marry a person and find that we are not compatible, what should I do?” asked Bhavna

It’s the society against the couples who are living together or vice-versa. Now with the judiciary going in favour of the love birds, we can only wait and watch how things changes in society.